I don’t know of life without some form of struggle. We are constantly faced with deciding how to manage the difficulties. Many years ago, when it felt like I was facing hardship after hardship without a break in between, I learned this prayer of gratitude. It has helped me to focus on the reason why I must continue to live regardless of the difficulties I face. It is a reminder to me to always know that there is goodness in all things and if I haven’t found it, that is because it has not yet been revealed to me.
After my third divorce, my world was shattered. Here I was with six children, I had no job and little formal education because I spent my teenage and young adult years being a wife and a mother. I went from having a home of my own to living with extended family. Although I did an excellent job of taking care of my children, I felt I had nothing to show for myself in the world. I believed that I had no value and considered myself a failure because my expectation of being married was dissolved. Its funny how we can care so much about how things appear to be and lose focus on how they are. The reasonable thing was to realize that my children were looking up to me and depending on me to be okay, but for a while I was just bitter and becoming more bitter as the days passed. It was someone who loved me dearly that noticed my growing bitterness and encouraged me to stop looking at what I felt was missing, focus on what I had, and to appreciate that. At this time, all I had were my children. These six little people, who didn’t care anything about a failed marriage or what level of education I had. They were just there with me each day ready and willing to be loved and cared for, ready to reciprocate love. So I began to speak aloud what I was grateful for. I would say things like “We do not have a car so we are walking today, but my babies are clean, and they are fed, and they are healthy. I am grateful and I am blessed. “
This new way of facing struggle changed how I faced the most difficult parts of my life. I practiced until it became habit. I learned to always look for the love and to find something to be grateful for. The more appreciative I am, the more blessed I am because I am choosing to acknowledge my blessings. I am choosing to acknowledge that goodness is present even if it takes me time to embrace it.
So here is my prayer…
May I always find where the love is. For love is life, and in all things, all situations, and all people. May I never lose sight of the goodness that is in my life. No matter the struggle, no matter the hardship, I am blessed. I am loved, I am necessary and essential in this life. There is always something to be grateful for. Ase
Ifayinka 